Safety. What does this word conjure up in you? Being under a warm blanket with a furry friend ? Your home? Your family? The known?

I was at a leadership retreat, a few years ago, and the speaker asked those who loved change to raise their hands. Then he asked those who were sitting in the same seat yesterday to lower their hands. Everyone did.

He shared that people are creatures of habit. In order to innovate we have to work really hard to overcome this tendency. Since then I have learned how true these words are. 

Our need for safety is actually a mortal enemy of growth and change. Both are required to claim your dreams. 

Playing if safe comes in many forms. It could be worrying about your physical safety. It could come dressed up as responsibility. It could come in the form of fearing what others may say when you make a career change. Whatever the form safety feeds on your fears.

Safety tells you that no risk is worth it. Safety’s job is to protect you.

Then one day you wake up and find yourself stuck. You are surrounded by walls of self protection you built. You’re stuck in your career. You’re mad at the world because life hasn’t turned out the way you expected it to.

What would happen if you stopped playing it safe? What if you could figure out a way to get unstuck? The good news is that you can!

You see breaking free from playing it safe is less about your circumstances and more about your thinking. It’s more about how you respond to those circumstances.  You are where you are because of what you did or didn’t do. Which means breaking free is up to you.

What I have for you today is a challenge to change. These “4 Tips to Break Free” are the tips I used to start taking down my own walls so I could build a life where I didn’t play it safe. Are you up for the challenge?

  • Remove the Paint:  Over the years you’ve decorated your walls of safety with paint. You’ve pretended to be someone you’re not because you couldn’t let people know who you really were. Over time you even forget who you were. Now you have the opportunity to take off these layers of paint and discover your passions, gifts and abilities that define who you really are.
  • Remove One Stone at a Time: Breaking free of this safety mindset and moving towards a growth mindset is a process. It took years to build up these walls and you won’t take them down in a day. Be patient with yourself and as you take down the stones, within your wall, remember that each stone is a part of your life that tells you something about yourself. You may just realize how strong you are and be surprised at the capabilities you have.
  • Reclaiming Stones: Not every stone in your wall is worth reclaiming. Some of your past fears and experiences you need to let go of. They don’t belong in the new life you are building. Say goodbye to that old coping mechanism that served you well as a child. Say goodbye to that skill you gained which you’re never enjoyed. You are continuously building a new foundation – chose wisely the stones you chose to reclaim and make room for new stones as you grow.
  • Stop Building Walls: Life can be hard. People can be hateful. Things are not fair. Life sometimes just doesn’t make sense. Yet you cannot feel joy without pain and if you live in your own little world you are just going through the motions. That my friend is not living. If you are going to discover and claim your dream I can tell you that you will have highs and lows.  But something happens when you grow – the peaks are more joyous and the valleys are less painful.

How will you stop playing it safe and begin to break free today? 

Copyright 2015, Mary R Miller