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Control Freak: How to Turn It Off (Part 2)
In part 1 of “Letting Go: How to Turn Off Your Inner Control Freak”, I asked you: Do you wish you could just let go of your inner control freak? And gave you an acrostic to help you LET GO by telling your inner control freak goodbye. If you missed part 1 click here.
Today we’ll go into 3 of the 5 areas in more depth.
The world is a very large place and to attempt to control it is frankly a large burden and most days, you have your hands full JUST being responsible for yourself.
Let’s return to the acrostic LET GO and dive deeper into LET with an open mind.
- LEARN: Gain knowledge about your internal control freak what are you doing and saying.
By learning what triggers your control freak and it’s language you can better discern when it is about to pounce. You are collecting data at this stage.
Here are some trigger phrases:
“Why can’t they just…”
“It will just be easier if I do it myself”
“No thank you I don’t need help”
“Well maybe if you did what I suggested to begin with?!”
“They just don’t get it”
“It’s really not that hard to understand!”
- EYES: Gain understanding about your internal control freak. What is the motivator behind your words and actions.
“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.” Recognize this prayer?
I truly wish that I could tell you to say the Serenity Prayer 3 times, click your heels and your frustration with people not doing things “the right way (AKA your way)” would be lifted. But it doesn’t work that way…
Having eyes is really taking the things you learned in #1 to help you gain an understanding of your internal control freak. It’s about looking at yourself in the mirror, admitting your weaknesses and searching for why you do what you do. This takes a LOT of humility coupled with self-compassion.
Ask yourself:
What are you trying to control or avoid?
What are you worried about?
What are you afraid of?
- TANK: Take the offensive and ensure that you have enough physical and mental energy to manage the freak.
This is all about a good offense. Have you been getting enough sleep? Eating right? Working out? Or are you worn down?
When your tank is on “E” it can be like watching a car wreck and not being able to do anything about it. You hear your control freak shift into high gear and you watch yourself become a jerk. This must be how the incredible hulk felt.
Ask yourself:
What happens when you tank starts to empty?
What are 3 ways you can be proactive to fill your tank and ensure that it doesn’t get depleted?
What do you need to do to fill your tank, you bucket, your soul?
What is your plan to control the freak today? Stay tuned for part 3 next week.